Swiss Humor

This just came in my inbox - a little humor to start the week:

"My Swiss friends just love baby talk. For example, they just can't drink a regular coffee and eat a normal-sized croissant like the rest of us. No, they have to have a Käffeli in a Tässli with a Gipfeli, Brötli or Weggli and e bitzeli bitzeli butter. Some, ofcourse, must have their Müesli. Isn't that nicey?

We men, beacuse we are toughies, go out in the evening to a Beizli for es Bierli or perhaps even es Tröpfli Wyy, but naturally not more than es Einerli because a decilitre of wine costs five Stützli or more, not to mention a Cüpfli of champagne.

The real purpose of my Gschichtli, however, is to tell you about a Schätzli I once had by the name of Ruthli. She was a real cutie barbie kind of girlie. I would go down to the Strössli to her Hüsli for a Bsüechli with a bouquet of Blüemli, knock on her door and say: "Schätzli, gisch mer es Schmützli?"

She would then give me a teeny-weeny, itsy-bitsy kiss and we would sit on a Bänkli in her Gärtli for a Stündli, holding Händli while I hoped we would soon go to Bettli for you know whatli. But all she did was drink a Schlückli mineral water, eat Leckerli and watch the Vögeli flying around the Bäumli. Sometimes we would take the Drämmli and go to the Zolli. Whenever I tried to get lovey-dovey, Ruthli would say: "Tschüssli, Schätzli!" and send me sadly on my Wäägli home.
Now I'm sickly and cannot stoppli talkiing like thisli.

Must go to my shrinky doctorli."